Point of No Return
by FurFurKanga
Summary: Life after marriage isn't always sunshine and rainbows.


The sound of a door banging shut was what woke Rachel up.

"Quinn?" She asked groggily. She lifted herself up from the couch, on which she had fallen asleep in the middle of waiting up for her wife, and catched a glimpse of her lover before the door to the study was slammed shut with a loud bang.

Rachel sighed to herself. Quinn was having one of those moments again. Whenever she was adversely affected emotionally, she would shut herself in, literally and figuratively, and refuse to talk to anyone.

Rachel padded over to the study and knocked – once, twice, thrice – before opening her mouth. "Quinn, babe, are you alright?"

"I'm fine, Rachel," Rachel mouthed as she heard Quinn's voice from the room, "I'm just busy with work. I'll be staying up late tonight. Go to bed without me."

Rachel glanced at the clock, it was the wee hours of the morning. She turned back to the door. "Okay, Quinn, good night. Don't work too hard." At first it was 'don't work too late', but after going to bed and waking up the next day to an empty beside and an empty house for several times, Rachel decided it wasn't the right thing to say anymore.

Without waiting for an answer, Rachel made her way to their.. _her.. _bedroom. There was no need to wait, because there won't be an answer. She would know, because she had stood outside the door the for five minutes the first time waiting for an answer. Four minutes, the next. Three minutes, afterwards.. until she knew there was no point in waiting anymore.

Rachel gave another sighed as she slipped into bed, mentally preparing herself for a restless night. Moments like this was ritualistic. Quinn comes home and makes a beeline to the study. Rachel, being a concerned wife, would knock and ask Quinn about it. Quinn would gently deter her with comforting words. Words, which when used repeatedly, become hollow over time.

Thus, Rachel would go to bed alone, thinking and wondering what had gone wrong. Rachel knew, in the beginning, that there would be problems. When Quinn was a teenager, she was unfortunate enough to be knocked up by a highschool boy in a random party. She tried to cover it up at first, but when it finally couldn't be kept in the dark anymore, when she finally got the courage to tell her parents, hoping for encouragement from them, she was greatly disappointed. Her father, Russell Fabray, had called her a disappointment and disowned her, leaving her out on the streets. With no money and family support, Quinn had learnt the only person she can rely on is herself.

Rachel understood it, and hence, during the years day were dating, she learnt to give Quinn space whenever she was like this, because confronting her would lead to rash words and unnecessary hurt , and usually after a day or two, Quinn would be okay. So it had become Rachel's motto to _forgive and forget_, whenever this happens, because she knows Quinn didn't mean it and Quinn would confide in her when the time comes, because pressuring Quinn into confiding in her only results in the default response.

"There's nothing to talk about," Rachel tasted the words in her mouth. The very words that Quinn used.

When Quinn uses those words, Rachel would step back. _Give Quinn some time and space,_ the little voice in her head would say and Rachel would listen to the voice because she told herself, in the end, loves conquers all.

Now, waking up the next day to find herself yet again alone in the empty house, Rachel wasn't so sure anymore. They've been married for years now and, although Rachel knows that Quinn undoubtedly loves her, there's this big part of the woman she loves that she doesn't understand… and sometimes, the little voice in her head would say, _you would never understand_.

So, it makes her wonder at times whether her motto had helped at all, or just delay the inevitable, because recently, Rachel realized that to forgive and forget could also be no different from _denying_ the existence of the problem at hand. They were two sides of the same coin, forgive and forget being just a more decoratively worded way of expressing denial. It was easier to ignore it all anyways, because why would anyone be willing to play the role of the villain by confronting Quinn?

Rachel wants to continue taking the easier path, she really does, but it's just that she just feels so tired nowadays. She felt that even though she loves Quinn, she can't stand it anymore. She can't stand acting like that everything is alright when it obviously isn't. She can't stand not understanding this big part of Quinn, it's like she doesn't even know the _real _Quinn at all! She tells Quinn everything about herself, and even though Quinn tells her things, she feels that there is this distance between them. A distance that shouldn't exist in a normal married couple.

Therefore, Rachel makes a decision, because the time for silence has long past.


End file.
